Saturday, January 29, 2005

What it's all about...

I recently came across this quote that a company was using for it's model, or business statement:

Our efforts involve focusing unquestionable dynamic metamorphosis with awareness of integrity from the bottom up.

What a bunch of garbage! To run a sucessful business, in any market, all you have to do is follow a few, simple rules:

Obeying the law, both in letter and in spirit, is the foundation on which a company's ethical standards are built.
All of the company's employees and directors must conduct themselves accordingly and seek to avoid even the appearance of improper behavior.
All employees, officers and directors must respect each other and obey the laws of the cities, states and countries in which they operate.

Now that's something I can live with. And who came up with that? What mega Dot Com CEO claims it? Which Fortune 500 lending institution uses it for their model?

Would you believe me if I told you that it is the mantra of HORMEL FOODS! You know, they can SPAM!

Sunday, January 23, 2005

My Tribute to a Great Man....

What Democracy Means to Me"by Johnny Carson (1991)

To me, democracy means placing trust in the little guy, giving the fruits of nationhood to those who built the nation. Democracy means anyone can grow up to be president, and anyone who doesn't grow up can be vice president.

Democracy is people of all races, colors, and creeds united by a single dream: to get rich and move to the suburbs away from people of all races, colors, and creeds. Democracy is having time set aside to worship--18 years if you're Jim Bakker.

Democracy is buying a big house you can't afford with money you don't have to impress people you wish were dead. And, unlike communism, democracy does not mean having just one ineffective political party; it means having two ineffective political parties.

Democracy means freedom of sexual choice between any two consenting adults; Utopia means freedom of choice between three or more consenting adults. But I digress.

Democracy is welcoming people from other lands, and giving them something to hold onto--usually a mop or a leaf blower. It means that with proper timing and scrupulous bookkeeping, anyone can die owing the government a huge amount of money.

Democracy means a thriving heartland with rolling fields of Alfalfa, Buckwheat, Spanky, and Wheezer.

Democracy means our elected officials bow to the will of the people, but more often they bow to the big butts of campaign contributors.

Yes, democracy means fighting every day for what you deserve, and fighting even harder to keep other weaker people from getting what they deserve.

Democracy means never having the Secret Police show up at your door. Of course, it also means never having the cable guy show up at your door. It's a tradeoff.

Democracy means free television, not good television, but free.

Democracy is being able to pick up the phone and, within a minute, be talking to anyone in the country, and, within two minutes, be interrupted by call waiting.

Democracy means no taxation without representation, and god knows, we've just about had the hell represented out of us. It means the freedom to bear arms so you can blow the "o" out of any rural stop sign you want.

And finally, democracy is the eagle on the back of a dollar bill, with 13 arrows in one claw, 13 leaves on a branch, 13 tail feathers, and 13 stars over its head--this signifies that when the white man came to this country, it was bad luck for the Indians, bad luck for the trees, bad luck for the wildlife, and lights out for the American eagle.

I thank you.

I will miss you johnny...the world will miss you

Saturday, January 15, 2005

Things to Remember...

The word “Truth” means - in accordance with an established fact or reality.

Be cautioned, however, “Truth” is an extremely tricky word as it is subject to endless shadings and degrees by all who claim to know it.

We here do not profess to know the absolute “Truth” completely, only a small portion of it based upon the current facts of the day. We remember that today’s facts sometimes become tomorrow’s fallacy.

Try to remember this when reading the newspapers or watching the national news broadcasts...

Tuesday, January 11, 2005

Is it just me, or....

NASA scientists using data from the Indonesian earthquake calculated it affected Earth's rotation, decreased the length of day, slightly changed the planet's shape, and shifted the North Pole by centimeters. The earthquake that created the huge tsunami also changed the Earth's rotation.

Is it just me, or does anyone else find this just a little bit scary?

Since this earthquake, Southern California is drowning, Northern California is freezing, and there's a huge heat wave accross the middle and southern parts of the country, in January!

And now the pencil neck geeks at JPL want to hit an asteroid and change it's path, just to see (analyze) what flies off in the dust? I'm all for progress and science advancement, but what happened to common sense?

Sunday, January 09, 2005

Going Up???

Since I work in a 13 story building, I began watching the people in the elevators with me...

Why is it that no one talks in elevators? It doesn't matter if there's two or twenty people crammed in that tiny tight space, it seems like the elevator ride is almost always a silent experience, save the occasional sniffling, ruffling of papers, or coughing of the riders.

Is it that people are secretly white-knuckled and afraid to talk, worried that the weight of their words might send the elevator (and its inhabitants) plummeting violently towards their demise?

Is it the lack of visual stimulation necessary to spark a conversation? Gee whiz! Would ya look at the way them numbers light up?

I remember watching an Oprah show (or was it Dr. Phil?) once where they talked about manners and general ettiquette. It's just simple good manners to say "goodmorning" or "hello" when you step into a closed public space or come across strangers. Smile at the very least.

But hey, acknowledge someone else's presence - how hard is that?

Thursday, January 06, 2005

Do We Dare to Judge...

When I once encountered a homeless man writing sheet after sheet of incomprehensible scribbles while muttering incoherently, I could choose either to believe that

(a) his writing had a "key" of sorts, a Rosetta stone hidden from me that would provide a translation, or
(b) his apparent writing was not really writing at all.

To this day, both these alternatives seem live options to me, not because they are logically compatible (they are not), but because I lack enough evidence one way or the other.

In this instance, I waver before the choices.

I have little doubt, however, that either those scribbles are in principle translatable, or they are not, and if the latter, that the man was irrational, though not necessarily a danger to anyone else.
For his writing to communicate beyond some basic tonal level—something like a cry or scream—I assume a fairly high level of intentional transparency, even if he holds beliefs that are bizarre or false in my estimation.

I must understand how his writing can represent the world, and believe that the representation can be recovered.

The presumption of language—or the gift of language to another being—is the presumption of truth-preservation.